Sunday, January 11, 2009

The Scars

I burned my finger the other day on my curling iron. I was in a hurry and chatting with a friend and I accidentally brushed my finger across my curling iron while I was curling my hair...talent, I know! But as I was starring at the scar left behind I started to think about the other scars on me that have a story. There is the one under my chin where I dove too far down and not out in my parent's swimming pool as a kid. I think there is another one somewhere on my leg from shaving and I don't know if this counts, but the place on my big toenail where an ingrown toenail was removed and another toenail grew back in its place (it's really quite interesting).

Really what got me to thinking was the scars that go deep under the skin, the number of scars on one's heart that have numerous stories with it and yet you wonder if anybody knows about them. How many homeless people do you pass on a street corner that may have a wound deep down that has never been healed properly, do you know their story, what caused it, what led to their current situation? What about the single mom with two kids, what's her heart story? Or the child abandoned by the one who brought them into this world...what does their heart say?

See, we all have scars, whether you can see them or not. We all have stories to tell and why we see things the way we do or why we act the way we do. I can't tell you how many times God has stitched my heart back together only to leave a scar, a reminder of what caused it, behind. I've been battling God with one of my most recent scars, praying...pleading that He would remove the memories and thoughts of what was once there, the love that once existed. I'm starting to think the answer is 'no.' I'm starting to wonder that by facing the memories, by facing the mistakes I made and the sin I fell into, only then can I begin to heal properly. A scar is there, or at least it will be. I have a feeling God has stitched up the wound, I just don't think that He has removed the stitches yet. As hard as it is to face the truth sometimes, I look forward to what comes out of this processing session with God...I look forward to the strength that it will bring and the wisdom I will gain.

I encourage you to show your scars, to be honest with yourself and with God...see what He may have to show you through your own wounds and hurts.

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