Thursday, June 4, 2009

The Wait

Twice in a matter of an hour or so today the Lord weighed upon my heart the word "wait."  I haven't thought much about "waiting" or a season of "waiting" since August or September of last year (whenever it was I wrote that blog about waiting, it's somewhere under the "older posts" tab).  It didn't take long for me to get it today though, as soon as He brought it up the first time (as I was walking out the door to my Thursday night "me" activity) I instantly knew it was time to blog about it to my faithful readers (there are people reading this... right?).  My heart was overjoyed because I felt like I finally got it, I finally get what this season is all about. Then at my Thursday night "me" activity I was worshipping the Lord to the Chris Tomlin song "Everlasting God." 

Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord, 
we will wait upon the Lord, we will wait upon the Lord.  
Our God, You rein forever
Our hope, Our strong deliverer
You are the Everlasting God, the Everlasting God
You do not faint, you won't grow weary

For months I would skip this song whenever I listened to this CD, not because it talked about waiting but for another purpose that looking back now I realize is completely stupid.  I guess what this all gets me around to is I finally get where I'm at, I've finally stopped running and I finally understand what it means to wait and just be in this moment.

The other day I was whining to God about how boring my life is right now.  Yes, I'm busy but I just feel like nothing exciting is going on... of course this whining was quickly reciprocated with a response from the Lord that went a little something like this...

"What?!? Now you're complaining because you think nothing is happening?  This time last year you were complaining because everything was happening and I wasn't even finished rocking the boat yet... what's it gonna take for you to get it?"

Okay so maybe it wasn't that abrupt and maybe it was a little softer and compassionate, but I wanted you to get the point.  I wasn't getting it... when things are crazy and hectic and "out of control" I complain to God that He needs to slow life down.  And then when nothing is happening, when the waves have silenced and the storm has passed I complain because it is "boring."  I'm sure God wonders if there is anything He could ever do to make us happy all of the time. 

So this is it... my season right now is to just wait, to roll with the punches, enjoy life where I'm at and take in every single blissful moment.  I've said a number of times that my life has changed, that I have changed since my nephew Billy died last March... I'm not sure I'll ever be able to put it into words but I know that I'm one crazily blessed girl and for that I thank my Lord and Savior for never leaving and never forsaking me.  Life is good, even when it is "boring" and doesn't always seem to make sense.  I'm in a good place and I wouldn't change it for anything.

What is God showing you about this season of your life?

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