Sunday, August 3, 2008

Deferred/Disappointment

"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life."
– Proverbs 13:12

I always wondered what "hope deferred," meant and then I read from Joyce Meyers that hope deferred is what we would call disappointment. We all get disappointed from time to time. We make plans, we have hopes and dreams and we know exactly how they are to pan out in our lifetime. But what do we do when our plans are altered, what we hoped or dreamed of doesn't turn out exactly how we would have hoped? Often times if we focus too much on the disappointment, the loss of our hopes and dreams, we get depressed. In those times of disappointment, when on the verge of allowing your feelings to dictate what move should be made next, choose to get reappointed.
Hope deferred does make the heart sick, but with reappointment, hope can be rekindled. With the Holy Spirit, our hearts can be made whole once again and our dreams restored.
I've had hope deferred many a time, I've faced disappointment more times than I can count. I haven't always faced it well either. I've very rarely chosen reappointment. This time is different, I'm realizing that just because hope is deferred for a while or in times when we thought it would be fulfilled, it doesn't mean that there isn't a better time or more to be experienced before finally fulfilled. I have a very big hope, a very big dream and over the years that has been my ultimate goal, my gold at the end of the rainbow. And year after year I have yet to see this hope fulfilled. With each year that passes, I allow this hope to be deferred, for it to lead me into disappointment and the belief that it will never come to pass. Not this year! I believe that this is going to be an amazing year full of reappointment, full of fulfilled dreams/hopes, and new ones established. Not just for me, but for my friends and family as well. I choose not to believe in the lies that say they will always be a hope deferred, that I will always live a life of disappointment. God has done an amazing work in my life, created a mighty strong woman in His kingdom and there is no disappointment in that. I am not disappointed in the number of times He has saved my life, for the number of times He has fought for my life when I could not, and the number of people He has brought to stand with me so they too could stand and fight and believe with me.
This year may turn out the same as years past, with a dream still in my heart yet to be fulfilled, but I will not allow it to lead me to disappointment for I know that with each day, with each month, with each year that I may wait for this hope, for this dream I trust that it will be that much more amazing than I could have ever imagined. I fully understand for the first time in 7 ½ years what it means to love the Lord my Savior more than life. I choose Him, a million times over, I choose Him.
Original Post: January 18, 2007

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